Peace cannot be kept by force; it can only be achieved by understanding.
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Understanding mediation
Parental separation results in various changes for families. When parents live separately, they need to discuss many issues including parenting plans, division of property, and financial arrangements. Making these plan scan be very stressful, especially when parents may be experiencing strong emotions such as anger, hurt, fear, and frustration.
Mediation helps parents communicate and focus on developing a plan to meet their children’s needs. Better communication leads to better agreements. Mediation provides a way for parents to work on these agreements together with a mediator, who is a neutral third party.
Mediators are specially trained lawyers or mental health professionals who help parents communicate clearly, focus on the issues which need to be agreed upon for the future vs focusing on issues from the past. Mediators help develop parenting plans that are reasonable and acceptable to everyone involved. Mediators do not make decision for the family, offer legal advice, or provide therapy. Instead, they help parents make decisions together that are in the best interest of the children. You cannot be forced to agree to terms discussed in mediation.
Parents who reach agreements in mediation are more likely to live by the rules of the agreement and spend less time and money on attorneys and court actions. When parents leave these decisions up to the court, they may feel like bystanders who are ordered to comply with agreements they never chose or agreed to. This often leads to anger and frustration as well as additional time and money spent in court.
What happens in mediation?
The mediator works with parents to clearly define which areas of parenting plans are agreed upon by the parents and which areas will need to be resolved. The mediator helps parents define the needs of the children and ways in which each parent can meet those needs.
Do we both have to participate?
Yes, mediation is a joint, cooperative, problem-solving process, it is necessary for both parents to participate. Parents need not feel friendly toward one another, but should be willing to work together to find solutions that will meet the needs of everyone involved.
Do children participate in meditation?
Generally, no. However, in some cases teenage children, may participate depending on the topic, the agreement of the mediator and the parents, the children’s maturity levels and their willingness to participate. Although children’s feelings may be explored in mediation, it is still the responsibility of both parents to develop the parenting plan.
Do I need an attorney?
Mediation is not a substitute for independent legal advice. Lawyers help their clients understand the law, make informed choices, review mediated agreements, and complete the legal process. The mediator focuses on helping parents communicate and reach their own agreements, but does not represent either party.
Are mediation agreements legally binding?
A mediation agreement may be drafted by the mediator and the parents as an informal working agreement. When an agreement is approved by a judge and is incorporated into a court order or divorce decree, it becomes legally binding. Any changes to an existing court order or divorce decree must be approved by a judge to be legally binding
What if we cannot work it out?
Mediation may not resolve all issues, but even partial agreements can help limit the time and expense of going to court. Sometimes it is helpful to suspend mediation and participate in counseling or to consult your attorney. Parents are then often able to return to mediation and resolve the remaining issues. Issues that cannot be resolved in mediation can be returned to the court for resolution.
What if I want to terminate mediation?
If you are thinking about terminating mediation, it is important to discuss termination with your attorney so that you can fully understand how this decision may affect the outcome of your case. If after consultation you still wish to end meditation, you may choose to do so.
Are there times when mediation is not a good idea?
Mediation works best when both parents are able to fully express their needs and interests and are capable of following through on agreements they reach. Mediation may not be the best choice if there are concerns about domestic violence, child abuse, mental illness, or compulsive or risky behaviors.
If you have concerns about your personal safety at any time before or during the mediation process, you should immediately notify the mediator and your attorney. It may be possible to complete mediation either virtually or with parents participating from separate rooms and the mediator carrying communications back and forth. In this situation, the mediator must take extra precautions to ensure each parent’s emotional and physical safety. Consult with your mediator to determine the best available method of mediation for your family.
How much does mediation cost?
Mediation is often less costly, both emotionally and financially than litigation. In McHenry County, mediation fees are agreed upon between the mediator and the parents or as set by the judge. The fee is typically shared by both parents with the percentage each parent pays determined by the judge.
Meet our Mediatior
Jennifer is a Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor who specializes in working with clients who have court involvement. She is an approved Family Court Mediator with the 22nd
Judicial Circuit Court of McHenry County.
Jennifer’s educational background includes undergraduate degrees in both Legal Studies and Psychology and a Master’s degree in Marriage, Couple, and Family Counseling. She has completed advanced family mediation trainings through Northwestern University and the Association of Family and Conciliation Courts.
Additional certifications include:
Specialized Family Therapist, Certified Clinical Trauma Professional – Level 2, Certified
Specialist in Anger Management, Certified Addiction Counseling Specialist, and SUPR
approved DUI evaluator.
In addition to Mediation, Jennifer also offers co-parenting therapy, therapeutic reunification, parenting time evaluations, and parent coordination.
Having successfully participated on both sides of the mediation table, Jennifer is able to provide a unique perspective to parents and help them reach a fair and amicable agreement. She prides herself on providing parents the most effective and cost-efficient solutions in a non-threatening
environment that is more conducive to developing peaceful and workable solutions.
Jennifer is accepting new clients for mediation services at our McHenry (4209 W. Shamrock Lane, Unit C, McHenry, IL 60050) and Crystal Lake (31 N. Virginia Street, Suite 102, Crystal Lake, IL 60014) locations.
Current fees for mediation services are $200 per billable hour. Call our intake specialists to schedule your mediation services and/or free 15 minute consultation with Jennifer.